Jeopardy! Featuring Charlie's Angels and Willard
by Queen of Hellions
Summary: This issss Jeopardy! Today's contestants are Natalie Cook, Willard Stiles and the Thin Man!


: A loud male voice booms over the classic Jeopardy set: This isssss Jeopardy! Here are today's contestants! : The camera shifts over to the podiums, where the Creepy Thin Man, Natalie and Willard stand. The Creepy Thin man puffs at a cigarette, annoyed expression on his face, Natalie giggles and bounces on her heels in an excited manner, Willard smiles weakly, shifting back and forth: Willard Stiles, Natalie Cook and The Creepy Thin Man! And your host, Alex Trebek!! : Alex strides out across the stage, cutting to center stage: ALEX: Good evening and welcome to another exciting game of Jeopardy. Today's contestants include an escaped mental patient, an adorable, sweetheart of an angel and..who the hell is that guy?! ALEX pauses for a moment, glancing toward the Director who is whispering to him: ALEX: Ahh...right. And a..uh...Creepy...Thin...Man. Must be another Calvin Cline publicity stunt. All right, let's get started! Today's topics are... Camera shifts over toward board: ALEX: Ow! That Hurts!, Fancy Cheeses, Literary Works, Rodents, Weaponry and Random Questions..absolutely invigorating! ALEX smirks toward Natalie, who seems to be 'bouncing' more excitedly: ALEX: Why don't you start us off Natalie, dear? NATALIE: Umm...I'll take Random Questions for $100! ALEX: If you were riding a canoe up the side of a mountain and one of the wheels popped off, how many pancakes would it take to fill a doghouse? THIN MAN presses his buzzer and screams as loudly as humanly possible ALEX blinks, staying silent, followed by the sound of feedback ALEX: Err...no. That brings you down to -$100 NATALIE presses her button NATALIE: What is Pepper jack?! ALEX: .Correct!! Which brings you to $1000 dollars. Choose another topic WILLARD: Uh...e-excuse me Alex...b-but that question was for $100...I think you added another zero WILLARD smiles innocently, hoping he caught a glitch ALEX: And I believe you're out of order, down to -$500 for you! I'm sorry Ms. Cook. Go ahead. ALEX seems focused on Natalie, grinning stupidly NATALIE: Umm...let's see here.... how about Fancy Cheeses for $200? SOME WOMAN appears on the screen, holding a platter of cheddar cheese SOME WOMAN: This is a classic cheese, a favorite throughout many cultures! WILLARD presses his button, though is looked over ALEX: Yes, Natalie? NATALIE: WHAT IS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE! ALEX: You are correct again $2000 and pic- ALEX sighs ALEX: Yes, Mr. Stiles? WILLARD: I think my buzzer is broken, sir ALEX: Did you need to share that on public T.V, son? Natalie, please continue... NATALIE: How about Rodents for 200? ALEX: This rodent is a constant pest in New York and some are reportedly 'As big as dawgs'. WILLARD frantically presses his buzzer, starting to yell out Alex's name ALEX smirks and over-looks him, glancing toward Natalie, who was not even paying attention ALEX: Yes, Natalie? NATALIE: Huh? Oh! Um.who is Cleopatra? ALEX: CORRE- WILLARD: NO! NO YOU STUPID BLONDE! IT'S A RAT! RAT! R-A-T! RAT! DOES THAT NOT COMPREHEND YOU STUPID WHO- WILLARD screams, falling to the ground after an electric shock is emitted from his podium. He twitches lightly before two men in white suits walk out onto stage, dragging him away. ALEX blinks a few times before shaking his head slowly ALEX: That eliminated Mr. Stiles from this round. Tragic. Natalie? Care to start us off.if you're all right that is. NATALIE glances down from the ceiling, blinking at Alex. Clearly, she was oblivious to the previous happenings. NATALIE: Um.how about 'Ow! That hurts!' for 100? ALEX: If your leg got caught in a large shredder, this noise would more than likely be made. THIN MAN presses his buzzer ALEX blinks ALEX: Er.yes Mr..Man? THIN MAN: AIYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! ALEX: Incorrect. Unfortunately, you failed to state the answer in a form of a-HOLY CRAP! THIN MAN pulls the sword out from his cane and rushes at Alex, continuing to yell at the top of his lungs ALEX yells and runs offstage NATALIE blinks, glancing around, apparently puzzled by the lack of host and contestants, followed by the screams that grew fainter by the moment. She suddenly smiles, throwing her arms into the air as she turns toward the audience. NATALIE: THAT WIN WAS FOR YOU, SPIKE!!!! Scene cuts to Natalie and Pete's residence. Pete shuts off the T.V., shoving the German Shepard/Great Dane pup off his lap. He mutters, crossing his arms and stalking toward the fridge for a beer. PETE: Bitch.I'm changing the locks. 


End file.
